why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Randomize