Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
