Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Randomize