My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
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