Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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