You're earring is so big in my mouth
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize