Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize
