I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Is her dick bigger than yours?
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Randomize
