So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
you never un-have a 4some
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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