so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
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