How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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