Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
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