sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
So squirting runs in the family.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
