i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize