I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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