we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
