Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Randomize
