yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
