I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize
