ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
