but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Randomize
