Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Randomize
