It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
