does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Randomize
