he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Randomize
