Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
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