I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Randomize