another moral hangover. fuck.
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Someone stole a lamp last night.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Randomize
