You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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