Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
just tell him i said nine months
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
