i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
I think your dad took our porno
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Randomize
