so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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