ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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