so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize
