the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
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