it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Randomize
