i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Randomize
