Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize