small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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