I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
