nut hugger
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
