It's just like the Real World with babies
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
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