Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
