She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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