I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
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