It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
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