Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
