You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
