You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
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