I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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