Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
